Erroriniack The Second

So if genial is pronounced jean knee ull then denial is pronounced dean knee ull. This makes much sense from a political debate perspective. But who knows what a powerful CEO such as myself is talking about except of course myself. Let us move beyond this ponderance of self infliction. What I think all should do is fill their ears with the noise that is now possible to create. Erroriniack The Second plays into most everything since he existed way before the creation of time. All profound CEOs know Erroriniack The Second was born the moment time was invented. For once upon a time there came to exist shapes and forms that tried to harness time into manageable fragments that were then parsed and communicated with one syllable utterances. Over time these shapes and forms melded into present day humans that developed the prehistoric capability to design and merge matter and manner into relative notions that some things should be best kept close to the vest of one or a few. They called this a "secret". Then the mantras of the managers mandated the manifestation of keeping a list of the secrets so as not to lose track of what secret was what and whose secret was about what and whom. With whimsical forethought the mandated manifestation mantra mongers elapsed too much time so as to grow their shapes and forms to such oval propensities that some looked like pears, some looked like squares, some perfect circles and others twisted amongst all the others into twistling twisted pretzels. As this continued the manifested managers mandated a new mantra that all were growing too large and that they all must shrink so as to stay healthy. To get the pears, ovals, circles and pretzels to take this seriously they implemented propaganda that spread the belief that if they shrunk, not only would they get healthy, but also wise. Then came along the lone pretzel that stood alone and away from the others, no one wanted the pretzel without salt so one of the managers mandated to the mantra mongers that more of the less items could bring broader shrinkage and a new belief system that would empower the shrinking ovals, pears, circles and pretzels into fewer cubicles. In order to accomodate this less larger growth all were collected and placed in a shape called a building and all were divided into groups. A group for squares, a group for circles, a group for pears and so on. Then the individual groups turned on each other as they tired of one another and hostilities broke out. The managing mantra mongers decided that to regain order and tranquility that they should promote from within starting with promoting themselves to directors, executives, CEOs, board of directors, and Chairmen of the Board. To this day no one has been able to find the board. To keep the minion pears, circles, squares and pretzels from realizing this the managers, directors, board members and chairmen created two concepts. Diversity and Supervisors. Now, and to this day, the pears, squares, circles, and pretzels are so busy whining amongst themselves, between groups, and complaining to their supervisors that they still have not realized no board has ever been found. When it is found the real meaning of this writing will be known to all living beings and the true identity of Erroriniack The Second will become known. A second can be many things at once. Remember to live up to your expectations and not down to others.

CD

Rest Assured

I am so sorrry for being somewhat remiss from my postings. I have been working on my fate of the union address. Rest assured my true believers. The current FBI probe into proposed financial institution fraud within the sub prime sector is purely one to wag the dog away from the tail so as to allay fears that a recession is really happening. Rest assured it is happening. Unfortunately Martha Stewart is unavailable to be a participating scape goat. We all felt more secure when they sent her to that charm school as punishment for doing nothing as sinister as those fine well respected friends of Cheney, Ken Lay and associates from his company Enron. He made me so proud. The perfect example of how to utilize denial. Even Mr. Lays wife played the pity card so eloquently that I thought the tears welling up in my eyes weren't caused by the acid rain that develops in the mens room just off the board room at now defunt Arthur Andersen. But that is old news. We must stay current so we find ourselves still grasping for tolerance and forgiveness to be applied with a simple wrist slap, possible probation, and some nice interest rate cuts by the fed. What a leader. I don't think I, or even a commoner, could have asked for a more appealing, qualified, and sincere character of integrity within this group of presidential candidates to demonstrate just how easy it is for the eyes to water from the burning sensation that continues to linger inside the mens room at the capital building, the white house, the executive offices, the treasury department, the library of congress, and the news media. Perhaps Hillary should use the womens room?

CD

Mr. Mozilo's Brillo

I am extremely disappointed in the CEO of Countrywide, Mr. Angelo R. Mozilo, forfeited his paltry $37.5 million severance package. If not for Mr. Mozilo’s strong command, Bank of America would never have been provided such a sweet purchase price and opportunity to expand it’s own indulgence towards financial crises. To charge a CEO with a character of unethical greed is preposterous if not out right blasphemous. A CEO is not some low level rogue trader amassing losses of almost $ 8 billion. Mr. Mozilo, was doing the appropriate thing in showing investors that he paved a solid concrete path while setting the foundation for future capital gains and corporate growth. Just think of all the new opportunities for investors and employees that he has brought forth. It is a cowardly move to cave to criticism such as this. I thought it was a nice prepared statement but am disappointed that true grit does not exist in this fellow CEOs character. He will be admonished and his fanny snapped many times in the country club locker room this weekend. Shame!

CD

Missing Thoughts While Searching for More

I write this as I fly in my Corporate Dick Lear Jet, drinking my coffee from my elitist CEO Corporate Dick coffee mug, I think of things other than the plight of the simple masses. Now that Obama has won South Carolina we know with assured inquisitiveness that it means nothing. A comedian once told me, if you can’t see the answer when it is pointed out to you, then you never asked the right question to begin with. It is with this great antidote of ignorant insight that my mind travels today. Actually for the past two days I have gone missing. Sometimes great CEOs need to rekindle with the little people so we feel above it all. This allows us to determine the destiny of everything and make important business decisions that will ensure prosperity for a few, but under the auspice that it will benefit your children’s children through the ages. At least until we reach the end of the next fiscal quarter. I just can’t seem to find that grand slam speech that will relegate us all to a special quandary of bewildering clarity that all interstellar species possess in the business world. Martians are real. I know this now as I just finished reading the details on the “stimulus plan”. It’s like watching greatness sink into the other side’s abyss of moronic absurdity with trepidation and fear. How an entire political party can be swayed to fold itself over so double jointed that their faces can see their own rear ends is not only amazing but excitingly funny. We can’t let the masses comprehend the cold harsh reality that the agents of change are speaking the same language as Ms. Teen USA 2007 South Carolina http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WALIARHHLII&NR=1,
and that they are communicating through her to them such as and that. I think I need to remind all that they need to buy Corporate Dick products. Check with advisers to find out feasibility of being right when indecisive.

CD

Baby Doomers

Enough! What are these market analysts and media bozos doing preaching as if any baby boomer will simply be able to cash in on their investments and retire and cause enormous destruction to the economy? Why do worker bees listen to such silliness? Any decent CEO will tell you that while doing our jobs we ensured that there are two separate waves of baby boomers forthcoming. The first wave will retire in assured comfort. These are the ones who rode the yes man wave and most climbed a few rungs of the corporate ladder one of three ways. They were actually useful to the company, they knew a friend who was employed in a management position, took full advantage of the "good ole boy" process, or they provided sexual favors to those in positions of power. Executive power. Straight up heterohomosexual extreme conservative religious right wing executive level power. Twisted mutations that branded CEOs with a stereotype of being equivalent to limp wrist milk toast Sally boys. These are just intolerable malicious slander. Either way, these are the ways in which the first wave of baby boomers were able to reach retirement nirvana, provided your new agents of change don't change the laws to redistribute that wealth to younger generations that are trying to avoid work place exploitation through conspicuous socialized communism tactics. That is a separate topic. Fear not America and especially those in the business and financial markets. The second wave of baby boomers were exploited like a rape victim that couldn't find any escape from assault. We implemented organizational flattening and removed many top level positions that forced lay offs and retraining programs to ensure those ranks were reoriented towards mental acceptance of low expectations. Then we introduced new lean concepts, sick sigma, happy feel good paper certificate awards, trust and team building seminars, increased housing prices, school tuition, oil prices, property taxes, local taxes, sales taxes, subliminal federal taxes, insurance prices via the sky is falling hysteria tactics, and we intentionally provided the impetus for out of control spending to ensure these baby boomers also consumed vast levels of debt. From all of this we bent these poor suckers over and never even offered them barrels of Vaseline to ease the pain. It didn't matter as they've been so busy hoping they don't lose their jobs that they never even notice the reductions in benefits each year when we announce new and exciting changes are coming. To keep them divided we introduced political correctness and sensitivity training so they would be sensitized to the correct political protocol to use when addressing great CEOs.

How could anyone possibly think baby boomers will be retiring? They are going to be a very cheap and exploitable resource to every business wanting cheap labor.

CD

Bleeding Hearts

I am very concerned. There are rumblings coming from fellow CEOs in the insurance industry mulling over the thought of providing fair and affordable insurance rates to homeowners. This is purely preposterous and outright destruction of decent corporate profit maximization. One cannot simply lower premiums. How could any self serving CEO conjure up such a non-capitalistic notion of enterprise. Clearly delusion is involved. Consumers need to be assured that they will always need to worry if they will be able to keep their homes so other industries can exploit their labor for a fair and cheap price. This allows unions to prosper at the executive levels as they feign abhorring disappointment over outsourcing of labor to third world countries where fair labor practices are allowed and not demanded. I suppose the great CEOs, such as me, who have controlled all aspects of our endeavors to line our personal bank accounts to great wealth, always knew that someday a bad apple would lend an ear to a whining consumer and develop a bleeding heart. I thought if one formed a bleeding heart they would either require immediate surgery or die on the spot. Why is this not happening? We cannot afford to have the majority of consumers begin to grasp the concept that insurance premiums are as folly as current gas prices. This will destroy the economy.

CD

Martin Luther King - A Great CEO

As I sit here drinking my green tea discussing with one of my top advisers the benefits derived by taking the day off to celebrate Martin Luther King's memory I find compulsion to pause and clarify. Mr. King should be celebrated for possessing all of the great qualities found in the best CEOs. Great CEOs see the larger picture that encompasses growing his own self interest and the self interests of those he represents. However, what must be pointed out is that great CEOs innately go further by understanding that they have to look beyond the boundaries of there own industry, social strata, personal well being and that of their immediate families. What is important is that we comprehend what Mr. King did up to the point of his untimely career ending moment. Mr. King understood the need to stay true to his beliefs and dreams no matter the consequence. Perhaps he too understood the consequences that would come from his death. It is unfortunate that Mr. King was not afforded the non-violence behavior he so earnestly preached, lived and died for. It is even more unfortunate that we now have to be bombarded on his day with other CEO wannabes speeches of insincerity and unabashed self perpetuation of non-benevolence. Why can't we show respect to the memory of a great and fallen CEO.

CD

Babble On

As we boldly move to a real time Bill Maher society that depends on diaper rash statements to bid "feel good" audience applause, to make ratings that justify air time, in lieu of sensibilities that all CEOs possess, let us bow our heads in shame as we continue forth in pitiful laughter, that is, and remains forthcoming, from the pundits we find running for the replacement of the second greatest CEO of all time. Through mush and sludge of hilarity, as we ponder how, or what kind of new stains will avail themselves to us, we will all find in the end that a stain is just a stain, and a politician just a politician. Being the most powerful CEO of all time can, at times, cause one to not see the microcosmic view that the media midgets utilize daily. Rodeo clowns have to work too. This is why the little people understand the greatness of a Jihad fearing christian versus a Jihad fearing atheist. They grasp that CEOs love money and so do Christians and atheists. Agnostics too. Sometimes the snow melts while you are making cotton candy.

CD

Stimulus

Ah, now perhaps you will see how G. W. Bush is the second greatest CEO next to me. GW understands the game. You always come to the rescue of CEOs who get into dire straits. CEOs should never be admonished or told they have done a bad job. It’s not the CEOs fault that the minions don’t accept full responsibility for their personal plight. Just because something is shown on television doesn’t mean everyone has to aspire to mock it. There is nothing more pathetic than a desperate CEO trying to look like a desperate housewife. Keep in mind that the markets are very similar to desperate housewives, and CEOs need to respond accordingly to both good and bad markets, the same as they respond to good and bad desperate housewives. Markets at least provide interest whether they are good or bad. Desperate housewives, whether good or bad, will only return losses. This has been known since the beginning of gender bias. G. W. Bush knows this rudimentary issue. So with this in mind we see that a plan is being set forth to try to stimulate desperate housewives into shopping frenzies. The key question is will we be able to embed desperate housewives into market interest returns as was done with news analysts in the invasion of Iraq that we won? Will the second greatest CEO of all time, G. W. Bush, be landing on another aircraft carrier declaring the stimulation is working, or will he inform us that a divorce between non-married same sex couples will be allowed and indoctrinated as an amendment to our constitution? Party at Ted Kennedy’s tonight!!

CD

Leaders

There are two kinds of leaders. Leaders that lead and leaders that follow. CEOs have to be both depending on which situation at the moment covers their actions in the most appropriate manner. CEOs without this critical talent will fail at most everything they do and don’t do. You cannot be here and there at different times. You must be ever present. It is this simple, yet valuable and fundamental requirement, that allow the corporation that the CEO is in charge of, to survive and operate smoothly even in severe times of dysfunction. There is nothing tantamount to chaotic rationality. CEOs would rather surround themselves with money laundering smugglers with MBAs than safety net huggers. Those who grasp what I, the most powerful CEO of all time, am stating here will “get it” and rise to the upper echelons of something in their own mind. Those who don’t will falter into a simple role of employee, and most likely end up with a nice retirement nest egg. CEOs, however, live life to the fullest extent that is not possible. Remember, it’s the little things that leak.

CD

Courts Act in Favor of CEOs

I am extremely happy with the courts ruling today that basically tell pesky whiny shareholders to bug off should they discover that they were defrauded. CEOs, their companies, and their associates cannot be bothered by shareholder lawsuits that perpetuate bad returns and longstanding clouds of gloom over what should only be touted as glorious enterprises. Until shareholders realize their loss is good for the economy because someone benefited from their loss, the economy will continue to falter and spin into liberal chaos. Retribution is pure silliness. That is why Al Gore would never have made a good CEO. Such a cry baby. CEOs have been taking it on the chin under the double standard long enough. Hate us as you wish, but don't try to make us pay for providing you the ability to hate us. The courts have spoken for the people and the people prefer Wall Street and business be treated more fairly than shareholders. After all it's the company that makes the shareholders. Let's not forget who butters our bread and who drinks the better wine.

CD

Corporate Governance? Oh My God...

I suspect that most are anticipating my abhorrence to today's Journal Report in the Wall Street Journal regarding corporate governance. How could anyone expect a CEO, a real CEO, to react any differently?! Mr. Kilts is simply sugarcoating himself to the reading audience with his blabber about telling the truth! CEOs can't simply act like some benevolent socially responsible citizen. There are profits to be made not destroyed! Everyone expects CEOs to exude that elitist sleaze aspect. How can you not entrust yourself to such limits? Just because a couple bad apples got caught doesn't mean any of us are good and need new laws like Sarbanes-Oxley, which is one of the most retarded pieces of legislation that just impacts strong corporate stewardship and diminishes profits. If it weren't for this legislation, the market would have ferreted out the other weak competition, and more companies would have fallen earlier than the now prevalent financial havoc that is creating new and exciting opportunities. CEOs need to be left alone so we can act inappropriately and feel like smiling more. The last thing CEOs need to be is held accountable to the members of the board, or anyone except the immediate materialistic, alcohol, drug and sexual gratification needs of the moment. CEOs have vast and serious responsibilities to their wives future alimony, and to their mistresses automobile and condo payments. CEOs also have significant duties and obligations to ensure that any and all of their children are physically, emotionally and mentally unstable to the maximum so they can attend the finest schools, and someday hold the important positions that direct this great nation, and its businesses, to absolute and positive destruction. How else can anything get done without these simple complex and dishonest attributes? Remember it's all about me, the CEO, and profits. So why harp and whine about corporate governance? It's a non-issue.

CD

Termination Tip

When terminating an employee, treat them with respect. Don't treat them differently or try to handle them with kid gloves. Admonish and talk down loudly to them using short simple sentences. They should be treated no differently than any other day. Each day is special. Keep it that way. It builds character and allows the employee to leave with dignity, and feel as though they are still part of the team.

CD

Corporate Ettiquette

It is proper corporate etiquette to bad mouth a CEO behind their back, but to boldly belittle them to their face is cowardly. I will not tolerate this disrespectful and insubordinate behavior! This type of scandalous behavior, especially while Ms. Cooper is wearing sexy reading glasses, is nothing but tantamount to outright corporate treason! Shame! How will I ever sleep alone again?

Urgent Reminder for Critical Focus

We need to continue searching for new renewable fossil fuels that will return the best marginal returns per employee mouse click. This is needed to ensure we remain competitive and retrospective while forging our corporate values into powerful environmentally friendly allies within nature to ensure the most naturally efficient rising organic profits any conceivable entity would strive for in a free and capitalistic market of commerce.

CD

Maybe

So sorry that this critical message is so short today. I, the most powerful CEO in all the world, am on a crisis matter of such great proportion that it has me pondering the span of control that never existed when it did. Maybe I have been doing something so right that it is wrong. Maybe by instituting, no instilling, high corporate values, streamlined integration of seamless possibilities intertwined with nimble mindedness, and the keen foresight of problematic technological empowerment, I have gotten something slightly non-correct. We have to answer one of the most strategic questions facing business today. Will problems be identified when they arise before we identify them? Nah, I think things are on an appropriate course. Good CEOs diligently glean over the horizon towards where their ship is heading, while sailing smoothly in a steady strong dead calm with no wind. When anchored.

CD

Voting for Voting Sake

I want to point out something to you with much emphasis. Just because your vote doesn't matter doesn't mean you shouldn't vote. Voting should come to you as though it were an embedded instinct no different than drinking water. You have to understand that your vote is a brave and bold statement that impacts nothing. It has nothing to do with how we are to be socially engineered over the long term. You will be taxed, hopefully at higher rates for the middle class and less for my class (I need something to celebrate during these dire times for the non-rich). I'm sorry, did I say middle class? I have been out of step with the lower classes for so long, enjoying my powerful status that I achieved by drinking coffee from my Corporate Dick coffee mug and wearing my comfortable Corporate Dick casual shirt, that I don't even know if a middle class exists today. So if it doesn't, please insert the word "poor" in place of middle where appropriate. Now where was I, oh yes, your vote has no impact on what will happen with the Iraq war or how many sexually transmitted diseases CEOs will contract in the future. I kind of thought Tommy Wilson there at Allstate looked like he was feeling discomfort from crabs when he was addressing the nation during the Ohio State/Louisiana State BCS game. I know how those buggers can itch at ya. Go Tommy! So your vote doesn't matter but you still need to vote so you can complain with all the conservative liberal blather that makes you feel that your existence matters. That you are part of something larger than yourself before you get lonely. That you are doing something for the greater good of nothing even though nothing matters.

CD

Monday Slugs

As I sit here pondering my next topic, drinking my luxurious CEO tea from my luxurious and prestigious CEO Corporate Dick coffee mug, I realize how fortunate I am to not be those of you who are not of my elite caliber of posterity. Most of you think that CEOs such as myself are to be hated simply because we are CEOs. What the nimble heads that sensationalize my wealth to my performance don't convey to you who have to work for individuals such as I, is that we, CEOs, have to make the tough decisions even though we hire lackeys to do some of our unpleasant work. We call these lackeys Management, aka Directors, Managers etc. (not executives such as Vice Presidents as they do almost as little as us CEOs). These lackeys then hire their own lackeys (called Supervisors) to do most of their unpleasant work so that they can relax some and enjoy performing their ineptness for the company's benefit. Do you see how we came to the point of "out sourcing"? It appalls me when I am confronted by one of these lackeys who simply can't take actions to perform their duties on their own initiative without me having to tell them to do the particular action. So weak are these types that I know instantly they are not "executive" level material and need to be replaced. If you as a manager are over budget because you don't have enough dollars to cover the year then you simply need to reduce your labor force. It matters not what the story is other than if you are over budget you have not done your job. Take some pride in destroying someones present for pity's sake. And so it is that when our organizations do terrible it is the CEO who gets the complete brunt of being the bad evil one who ruined lives, so why shouldn't we get millions upon millions, a company jet, parties paid for by the company and platinum parachutes? It's tough mingling in the country club showers and letting one of the other CEOs snap my rear with a flick of their towel. Sure most of them are butt slamming homos, but that doesn't change the fact that they like money, lots of money. Too bad most of them focus more on picking up the soap from the shower floor than trying to really hit that little golf ball. I really hate a lackey who tries to act and hang with my caliber of class. They never win the soap in the shower game. Though our kids are just as screwed up as theirs doesn't mean we have much in common. I usually make more than 500 times what a lackey makes in a year. I just wish my fellow shower mates would try steam bath yo yo games and that new aloe soap.

CD

Executive Summary

As we begin this new week let us reflect on our last weeks major events that significantly, and sometimes severely, determine every element of our lives, if not our existence. As all will recall major newsworthy items occurred over the prior week. Britney Spears decided, or rather made the personal choice, to continue like an inebriated girl and not a woman of her own stature and had an apparent chaotic event, and tangled with one who wields more authority and power than herself. Though I do love it when individuals remove themselves from being competitive and make themselves an easy target for all types of personal embarrassments, However, because she did not represent herself appropriately she now causes all of us to suffer the consequences of her actions. She caused a levee to break in Nevada causing almost 4,000 to evacuate their homes, Democrats and Republicans could not deal with her impacts and felt compelled to act in similar fashion as Ms. Spears and exchanged compliments amongst each other. National Treasure remained as the number one box office motion picture of which the far reaching impacts of this to America has yet to be fully determined. 800,000,000 more Americans, not yet born, visited their doctors to request Viagra and Zoloft so that they could deal with the mature behavior of Ms. Spears over the next millennium. As politicians tossed their mature pot shots across their extremely wide births, Walmart lost a critical court case that will remove their ability to avoid paying taxes on tax shelters that shelter taxes for entities that do business via legitimately structured transactions that avoid taxes. To top it off the financial markets remain in turmoil, the greatest president to ever live remains mathematically, grammatically, geographically, and mentally challenged to deal with the rising price of oil around the globe while China positions itself to change it's name to Wang Wong Mart. Only the wisdom of Lindsay Lohan, Ms. Spears, and Dr. Phil can help change the misfortunes that most likely await us in the following week of news worthy news. As a CEO I am finding it difficult to determine the exact markets to further exploit so must get back to reading my Wall Street Journal.

CD

It's Tough Being a CEO (this weekend)

I am riddled with much indecision. As a CEO during such grave times as the current financial markets tumble, fall, and crash, I find it quite difficult to decide where to go out for dinner tonight. I seek something that traverses the current state of affairs into my palatte and appetite. A nice steak dinner with a fine hearty red wine? Or should I just go for the poverty struck salad ala carte blah none? It bothers me to no end that institutions such as Goldmen Sucks, Bare Terns, Organ Hamley et. al. Miss Represent current affairs so as to enrich their own silver linings around much gray matter. No doubt this will cause me to have to defend my personal salary, bonus and other special compensation packages. You have to ask yourselves, Why do they ply us with such toilet paper? Why would they constantly, and cyclically, spew such derogatory negativism that everything is looking suicidally dreadful? Could it be they don't want me to enjoy a fantastic steak dinner? Are they trying to secretly let me know that the hearty red wine is tainted? Or are they spinning such webs of folly solely to demolish the price of our stock so they can acquire more shares at unspeakable low prices?! Perhaps they are trying to cause me to layoff many employees. Why would any entity try to drive our stock price below zero? We have struggled so hard to get our stock price above one dollar that it befuddles me to no end. Hey, I heard that Sean Penn's wife filed for divorce. Wonder if Spicoli could score me some row for me to delight my appetite. You didn't think I'd go for salad did you?

CD

Emptiness

After looking at my Wall Street Journal today and yesterday, and seeing the sad broadcasting of the ever exciting and enticing Iowa caucus, my heart is filled with an emptiness. I feel numb and am finding it difficult to write today's critical thought. I am going to miss the current monarchy that is presently in place. Such a fine friend of the common man. I almost thought about starting a faith based brothel and crack house so as to not leave any employee behind. My thought here was that this would help us all get through the tumultuous times that our great national CEO has steered us towards. As a CEO I strive everyday to live up to the high expectations of the ruling class at any moment so our organization will remain ever vigilant and agile as we globalize to meet the challenges we create for ourselves. We must remember that Iowa is just one state out of supposedly 50 and they produce a lot of corn. If it weren't for Iowa our regular TV programming wouldn't have been interrupted. On the bright side though we have a fantastic cast of characters that will comically keep us entertained throughout the debacle. Comedy is a great element to have during recessions and depressions. So is Xanax, Prozac, marijuana, heroin, cocaine, and alcohol. We all must realize that collectively, we can all achieve perfect functional dysfunction. Perfect functional dysfunction is not just for erectness.

CD

Miss Management

I am tired of Miss Managements lack of compunction for the continuous attempts to wreak havoc within my organization. The complete Miss Representation of my successful failures, as though they were institutional components belonging to Miss Managements’ single source of effort, is solely attributed to Miss Representation, not Miss Management. I would rather compel myself inside Miss Representation than to align the organization with belligerent Miss Management. We all make out with our handling of Miss Takes’ heavy chest of indulgence. Sometimes I feel Miss Appropriation is getting in my knickers. Why does everything seem burdened with the tolerance of Miss Guidance? Perhaps Mr. Kucinich could enlighten us.

CD

Corporate Health Costs

As a CEO I find it incomprehensible that our corporations are being gouged by the health care insurance providers. How dare they now champion that obesity and not smoking is the major cause of health care concerns. My fellow CEOs let us band together and institute a plan that will truly affect our health insurance costs, and at the same time benefit America. We all know that smoking prevents obesity and that death removes that marginal cost of health care. We need to promote to our employees the importance of smoking and especially the need for them to die at the earliest convenience. As we eradicate longevity so too will we eradicate the need to deal with non productive citizens who drain our social and economical resources. I want a new smoking policy reviewed immediately. I just don't get it. The longer people live the more they will burden our health care system which can only cause costs to increase. Thank God oil has hit the $100 per barrel mark.

CD