Miss Management

I am tired of Miss Managements lack of compunction for the continuous attempts to wreak havoc within my organization. The complete Miss Representation of my successful failures, as though they were institutional components belonging to Miss Managements’ single source of effort, is solely attributed to Miss Representation, not Miss Management. I would rather compel myself inside Miss Representation than to align the organization with belligerent Miss Management. We all make out with our handling of Miss Takes’ heavy chest of indulgence. Sometimes I feel Miss Appropriation is getting in my knickers. Why does everything seem burdened with the tolerance of Miss Guidance? Perhaps Mr. Kucinich could enlighten us.

CD

Corporate Health Costs

As a CEO I find it incomprehensible that our corporations are being gouged by the health care insurance providers. How dare they now champion that obesity and not smoking is the major cause of health care concerns. My fellow CEOs let us band together and institute a plan that will truly affect our health insurance costs, and at the same time benefit America. We all know that smoking prevents obesity and that death removes that marginal cost of health care. We need to promote to our employees the importance of smoking and especially the need for them to die at the earliest convenience. As we eradicate longevity so too will we eradicate the need to deal with non productive citizens who drain our social and economical resources. I want a new smoking policy reviewed immediately. I just don't get it. The longer people live the more they will burden our health care system which can only cause costs to increase. Thank God oil has hit the $100 per barrel mark.

CD

It's Time for a Witch Hunt

Blast it! Someone needs to take the heat for the recent atrocious activitities of business. Imagine those evil empires attempting to make lending money for mortgages to losers available at any cost! How dare they! No one is getting hurt. The losers were able to get a house for a short time which is far better than they would have done without this easy access venture. The businesses will falter for a time but who cares. Remember, it doesn't matter in the short run. It's the long term that matters. Where is Michael Milken now that we need him? Such cowardice. Oops. Or is that Whoops as in the utility scam in the early 80's in Washington State. And let us not forget the notorious and most recent collapse of conglomerates such as Enron, Worldom etc. Certainly of which our political leaders squelched as quickly as possible so as to prevent a total collapse of our financial markets since all know full well that creative accounting was going on as easily as giving credit cards to any knuckle head who wanted a mortgage. So why not give em a mortgage huh? So let us start the new year with a scape goat of sorts and a much broader deflector. Just look at how the baby boomers are going to bankrupt our country as they start to access social security that they paid into as required by law. But hey, lets just change the law.

CD

New Opportunities

Today as I read my Wall Street Journal I realized a lot of money is being written off because of successful wealth management by some of the finest financial institutions in the world. It is during the process of hearing great success stories like these that makes me continuously seek new opportunities for growth. That's when it hit me. These institutions need to diversify their businesses, and one of the most lucrative and least exploited opportunities is acquisitions of college football teams. I think we could offer teaser rates and shares of stock to acquire Ohio State University, Boston College, Florida, and a few other top notch institutional football programs to maximize our growth potential, exploit the maximization of wealth principles to the fullest, and shift some of the risk that is being hysterically misrepresented in the financial markets by the press. The BCS (Bowl Championship Series) is a very lucrative business being sullied by the guise of higher education fundamentals that diminish the visibility of power within our great nation.

Note to self: Be sure to learn "lean" liberal practices in order to woo the knuckle heads.

Purchase New York Dolls music

CD

Christmas

At last. It's over. It looks like we pulled another successful year of profit maximization while maintaining our "we care" image. We need to push that profit making cash cow "green" policy even harder during 2008. God I love this global warming crap. Al Gore is a true friend of Corporate America.

CD

A New Day

Is it? Well, maybe you can kiss ass in a different way today so you feel like you are more productive and your job more secure. I know, I know, emailing all types of funny jokes, videos, and website articles over company servers is an integral part of your job functions. Likewise, doing all your shopping on-line, talking on the phone all day taking care of your personal business, also makes you a stand out employee. I am just concerned that your personal life isn't doing well. So please let me know if we are overworking you or stressing you out.

CD

December 7, 2007

It looks like everything is okay over in Pearl Harbor. However, apparently things are not so good in the American housing market. Pundits from all over are chanting, screaming and pontificating how we are doomed, that the U.S will soon be no more. I don't get it?

Regarding our current state of the unions economic status.

Corporate Dick says hooey! What crisis? The glass is half full. While we watch the transition from “what’s mine is mine” to “what’s mine is yours” let us be thankful that we lose everything now instead of watching some new democratic policy get implemented to redistribute your wealth to some punk who couldn’t even spell the word WORK. There’s nothing like a nice long Economic depression to go along with that Psychological depression. Recessions are for weenies.
Now get back to work, well, at least act like you are working. Isn't shopping on line fun?

CD