Sure the sky is falling. All the media pun-dents are screaming, if not outright demanding, for a complete stock market melt down. They scurry out to the street corners like prostitutes gaming their johns but the lure resides in their corporate logos, cameras, microphones and celebrity. Delivering you the gloom and doom with a glorious blond bombshells sensual smile. As you delve into their devilries of delirium that the worst depression since the Great Depression is around the corner, let us keep some sensibilities and review why the Great Depression will not recur.
Cigarette smoking was the norm in the days of the Great Depression. There were no thoughts of going green except marijuana was also still legal to use per se (though the push to make illegal was in process at the time). A vegetarian was usually a word that was misheard in lieu of the like sounding word veterinarian with no further thought other than a snicker. Alaska and Hawaii were not even states and this has a significant economic impact to the current economic state. Hawaii lured Baywatch from California, and Alaska has provided lots of moose and grizzly bears to our now vast national and global economy.
Many other things were different back then. Small differences like no televisions, many still had no indoor bathrooms nor electricity. Neanderthal man was just starting to become extinct. NASA did not exist which means the moon did not exist back then either. Another key element is that many parents did not even exist then.
So as you start to panic and be overcome with dread, simply realize we are almost a no smoking nation today. We are extremely conscious about green things other than money such as saving trees in lieu of jobs or getting marijuana legalized. Most importantly we have gained much wisdom and now realize that monkeys can lead us to Great Derision in 2008. Of course you could go home for the Jewish holidays.
CD
Sometimes its only money.
Monday, September 29, 2008
Ahoy! Them Thar Pirates Be!
What is the difference between citizens being held hostage to a tyrannical government gone amuck and hooligans kidnapping an oil tanker on the open seas off the horn of Africa and holding it for a 20 million ransom? Apparently there have been variations in the meaning of the term booty. Pen to paper as sword or gun to vessel captain shows the differnce to be around 699,980,000,000 (thats billion). So whose going to notice that bootyful bounty of oil enriched 20 million handsome ransom on the open seas off the horn of Africa? Not me.
CD
Sometimes all you can do is pee.
CD
Sometimes all you can do is pee.
Sunday, September 28, 2008
Failout 2008
What to do? What is happening? Is there a major financial crisis? What is WAMU? What does this mean for me and will this stop english? Can my business meet its payroll? Should I care about rich people? Should I care about poor people? Will Sarah Palin feel my pain the same way that Joe Biden feels his pain? Is Sarah Palin richer than Barack Obama? How has this economic crisis impacted McCain, Obama, Biden, Palin, the Bush clan, the Clintons, the rest of the senate and congress? Whose to blame for my problems?
Do not fret. Corporate Dick is writing a book to answer all of these questions and more. More questions like
Who the fuck is Ahmahdenajad and how do you spell that pricks name?
Where is Iran and why does it exist?
Do all muslims fart?
Do all christians fart?
If both muslims and christians fart why is there friction?
Who can breathe in the economy?
Will anti-abortionists legalize marijuana?
How the fuck do you spell amahdenajad?
Should the United States consume Mexico through eminent domain sterilization?
Who in the house of representatives have had their nuts snipped?
Will Emily turn gay?
CD
Sometimes when you think about it you feel hungry.
Do not fret. Corporate Dick is writing a book to answer all of these questions and more. More questions like
Who the fuck is Ahmahdenajad and how do you spell that pricks name?
Where is Iran and why does it exist?
Do all muslims fart?
Do all christians fart?
If both muslims and christians fart why is there friction?
Who can breathe in the economy?
Will anti-abortionists legalize marijuana?
How the fuck do you spell amahdenajad?
Should the United States consume Mexico through eminent domain sterilization?
Who in the house of representatives have had their nuts snipped?
Will Emily turn gay?
CD
Sometimes when you think about it you feel hungry.
Sunday, September 14, 2008
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